Hi, I am a compulsive gambler …….

I am now twelve years and 1 month gambling free !

The GA family has enabled me to turn my life around 360 degrees. I now have the strength, faith and courage to face life and its challenges head-on without the need for a crutch. It has also changed my relationship with my family and all for the better. I had to show them that they could trust me again, one of the hardest things to do. Words don’t suffice it’s your actions that speak volumes. I am one of the individuals that landed in prison due to my gambling compulsion.

It didn’t happen overnight, it was a gradual descent into hell. I was totally oblivious to the direction I was taking. It started with small bets and wins and progressively grew, with the amounts I spent and the losses I incurred. We must always remember that Casinos etc are businesses and businesses don’t like to run at a loss, so the loss ALWAYS ends up being with the gambler. The saddest part is that when family and friends notice the change in you and your behavior and try to help, they face a losing battle. Gamblers are always right ! We are driven by compulsion ! If anyone tries to help we feel they don’t understand us ! We lie, we cheat, we steal, we connive and eventually we will hit rock bottom.I kept a journal while in prison and would like to share my opening lines with you …. “My life as I had always known it ended officially in April of 2013, exactly one month and four days before my 50th birthday, with the following words uttered by the Judge – “I hereby sentence you to ten years imprisonment ….””

What I didn’t realise then, is that it was the beginning of a new chapter in my life. I spent five years and three months behind bars. I learnt so much; normal people, with normal backgrounds make mistakes and for those we have to pay. I decided to take this time to better myself. I had done wrong, major wrong – to my loved ones, to friends, to those who had tried to help me. I couldn’t waste this time feeling sorry for myself, instead I decided that this time would be for bettering myself, starting to make amends and get back in touch with the spiritual side of life. You cannot get better unless you take responsibility for the wrong you’ve done, you must want to stop this downward spiral and make a conscious effort to want to be a better person. It’s not always easy, in fact some times you want to give up but that is what the GA family is for. You can reach out and there is always someone willing and happy to hold your hand through your toughest times. Never give up ! It’s a “one day at a time” journey but the peace that you will eventually find is priceless!